Thanksgiving is Here. Let’s ignore it.

Oh the sweet final days of classes before Thanksgiving break. The student attendance drops significantly and even the professors proclaim their need to leave as well. Campus is a little more dreary, with no one wanting to leave their rooms, aside from the brave souls who want to play video games on the nice high definition television screens.

I’ve always enjoyed watching students around holidays. The day after halloween, campus is dead, students are hungover, or on the verge of diabetes. Around Thanksgiving, there’s pure joy of all the rich kids getting to go home, while the unfortunate are making plans on figuring out what the hell to do since campus is closed.

At least this year, there’s Hanukah, Doctor Who, and just pure nonsense going on at those dreadful pre-before-thanksgiving-black-friday-but-just-kidding-it-isn’t-even-friday black friday sales.

I’ll be making pizza for Thanksgiving. I’ll be riveting in anger equal to the amount of Native American I am. I’ll watch Doctor Who over and over, because hey, David Tennant is a cutie and Matt Smith needs to be the Doctor for long as possible. I’ll even venture outside and watch idiots fight over plastic and fabric made in Southeast Asia. I’ll watch the news and laugh at the idiots who forced their loved ones to drive thirty minutes to the nearest Best Buy and bring them turkey dinner. I’ll watch the newscasts that have to mention that Thanksgiving is a day to be thankful every two seconds and show human interest stories because there wasn’t one journalist who couldn’t admit to their parents that yes, they are hated and not worth spending time with, because damn it dad, if you actually cared I would have been an engineer and not a journalist!


I don’t have a dad, nor am I good at math.

But what I am good at is wondering why the hell the sign on the north side says “Big Black Friday Sale” with no other context. I know some of my black friends will enjoy a sale geared just towards them.

Really, Thanksgiving is nothing about giving thanks. It’s just another benchmark saying that we all need to get our shit together so your idiot family doesn’t get pissed off at you for not buying Christmas presents. I’m sorry the bill collectors wait until the fucking holidays to finally bill you for a $20 co-pay from an appointment and the additional expenses for an x-ray you got in May of that year.

Thanks Obama.


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